“Gentleman’s Code” Book Summary + Lessons + Inspiring Quotes

“Gentleman’s Code” by Natali Zeitzer, as the name suggests, talks about the rules and norms that shall be followed to be a conventional gentleman. We have always known gentlemen to be calm and composed, but surely, there’s a lot more to it. Gentleman’s Code is a genuine guide to how to earn respect.


The Gentleman’s Code

-Keeping the calm intact is the basic necessity of being a gentleman. Any argument done shouldn’t be heated, politeness has to be maintained and hitting-below-the-belt is a strict no. 

-In a conversation, always listen to what the speaker has to say. Never complete the statement for the speaker, for that is rude and it implies that you want him or her to finish it fast. 

-It is always expected that a gentleman will have a strong opinion about his political choices but he shall never project it on anyone. 

-It is always good to try to resolve an issue between two people, but if you see that it is not in a state to be resolved, it is always better to leave them, because otherwise you’re only going to make any one of them your enemy and in turn, you will be disliked. 

-Whenever a conversation is being carried out, never be distracted by anything, be it any device or any other person. Try to pay your full attention, remember, a Gentleman is always a good listener

-Always address a situation with compassion. Try to put your opinion forward, yet respect the other person’s opinion as well, even if it differs from yours. 

-Respecting the people around you is another vital key to being a gentleman. Even if you think that people cannot match your Intellect, still, keep calm and composed and don’t project yourself to be any superior. 

-Never listen to talk back. Listen to understand what is being conveyed and then give your opinion only when asked to. 

-Do not step into a situation and try to give your opinion about it, that is against a gentleman’s modesty. 

-Overhearing is a strict no for a gentleman. If something is being discussed which you’re not a part of, you can easily move away from that particular place to keep tye decency. 

-Always be crisp and precise with your opinions. It is not accepted when you try to convey something by telling a long story about it. Instead, be short and crisp.

-But, if someone is narrating something that’s pretty lengthy, then do listen to the person without being impatient. Impatience is always disrespectful. 

-Never draw comparisons between your friends, it seems to be very rude. The merits of both the people can be discussed without comparing them to each other and you can still put your opinion about them. 

-Never talk behind the back. If you see that the other person is indulging in something of that sort, change the topic if needed because it is very disrespectful to the person being talked about when he or she is not present there. 

-It’s okay to let go of the attention at times. Too much attention will make you feel exhausted and in turn, it will bring out the irritation in you and that is very unnecessary as a gentleman. 

-It is good to be a perfectionist but definitely doesn’t overdo it. Small details which do not mean a lot to the situation can surely be overlooked.

-Do Not use terms that are from your expertise because a common man might not understand the same and that would seem to be very rude and the other person might feel inferior around you. 

-Having fun with your colleagues is all fine. But never be a laughing stock for them. You can laugh with people but don’t let them laugh at you, because that is wrong for your character. 

-Making jokes is always okay, but never hit someone personally. Talking about someone’s personal issues in the form of a joke is very disrespectful. 

-It is okay to have contacts and sources but never show it off, as that seems to be very unhealthy for your reputation. 

-You can know someone who is influential but never rub it off on people because that makes you look like you’re bragging and are power-hungry. Always stay low, unless highly necessary.

-If you feel that you’re are being unable to keep your cool in a conversation, either voluntarily change the topic or leave the conversation. 

-Always be patient, calm, and composed.

-It is not always easy to deal with any kind of rumor about you, but if you do, be polite and let it go. There is no use in talking about it, because the more you talk about it, the more you indulge it.

-Always have a strict note on your choice of words. Even if it is a simple compliment, the correct choice of words always do the magic and that is exactly what you need to be a gentleman. 

-Being too much of anything isn’t good for your image and you need to understand that no sane person likes extra flattery words, it makes you look creepy. 

-Never use unnecessary rude adjectives to describe anyone, no matter if it’s regarding their character, physical appearance or be it anything. 

-Always be polite while addressing someone, respecting humans is the biggest key to success, always. 

-Never be in a gossip culture. It is absolutely not acceptable and it is very disgusting when you gossip about anything. No gentleman wastes his time in gossip.


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